Five Things Dean Winchester Would Rather Fly On A Plane Than Admit

[scribblinlenore]

For bitchygrrl



Five Things Dean Winchester Would Rather Fly On A Plane Than Admit

1. Dean knew what would happen when he told Cassie the truth about his life, and he did it anyway. Because one day he was going to have to choose between her and his family, and it wasn't going to be her, and he really did love her.

2. He used to just show up at Stanford sometimes, unannounced, and follow Sam around without him noticing. Dean would sit in the back of a lecture hall and watch Sam intently taking notes. Or spy from behind a tree while Sam lolled on the grass, carefree, laughing with his friends. Sam looked so honest-to-God happy every time it made Dean's chest clench. He was so glad for his brother, and he'd never hated him so much.

3. Dean doesn't think their dad got everything right with them, but Sam has always been so aggressive in his finger-pointing that Dean just kind of gets stuck being their father's apologist.

4. He can't remember his mother's smell very well anymore. It used to be so clear, from all the times she held him and made everything better, warm and powdery and a little bit like Lemon Pledge. When he missed her really bad, he'd close his eyes and conjure up her scent, and it was almost like having her back again. Little by little, though, it started to slip away, and Dean can't help being bitter, wondering why he has to lose this, too.

5. Sometimes he wakes up in the middle of the night, cold all over, and he has his brother on his mind, all the weird ass shit he can do. And Dean's never sure if he's afraid for Sam or-- He can't even finish that sentence.

Comments

[improperlydone.livejournal.com]

They're all so wonderful. But the last one...I can see exactly how true that would be. Very powerful.

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you thought this worked. And yeah. That last one? I'm pretty sure that's Dean's biggest secret fear.

[bitchygrrl.livejournal.com]

Thank you these are great and that last one, ouch, loved it.

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked these. And thanks for the great prompt!

[destina.livejournal.com]

Aww. These are so gorgeous. And they all make me so damn sad for Dean, especially that little spark of hate for Sam, leading his normal life and being happy. *sigh*

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I really think Dean has to harbor some secret resentment against Sam, not just for choosing a different life, but for loving it. Poor Dean! And poor Sam, too.

[lizzie451.livejournal.com]

ouch and wow. These are just... Dean. Dean knowing it wouldn't be Cassie, and hating Sam a little and defending Dad b/c *someone* has to, and his Mom and that last one... Just... ow. I'd love to see this whole list expanded into fic... I mean, it has angst!Dean down perfectly, I'd like to see a bit of C to the H, ya know? :)

Or maybe an answering list from Sammy who hated Cassie for taking even a little of Dean, knows that Dean was at Stanford, and has to point the finger b/c Dean certainly wouldn't, doesn't remember his mom *at all*, and is scared of *himself* for Dean....

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

Oh, doll! I think you wrote the perfect answer from Sam. I can imagine him harboring all those secret thoughts and feelings. *hugs both boys*

[thistle90.livejournal.com]

These are great. Very painful. I especially like the second one.

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked these, doll. Those boys...they just are hurty.

[idontkare15.livejournal.com]

Those were so good. I really liked #4

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked this! Poor Dean. I really can imagine him just slowly having his memory of his mother fade, and being angry all over again because of it.

[luvmax1.livejournal.com]

These were just angsty and perfect. Dean lives in a world of such emotional pain, as we saw in the last couple of episodes, but he hides it so well that his family never sees it, and you really captured that. And that last one just gave me the chills.

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you thought these worked! I honestly started off to do something humorous about loving chick flicks or something, but Dean...he just went to the hurt place.

[luvmax1.livejournal.com]

I think in the long run, Dean is destined to never get to a happy place, unfortunately.

[tamalinn.livejournal.com]

i haven't read any spn fic yet other than yours. yours is so good, and you write the winchester boys so fucking well that i'm afraid to venture into the fandom fo' reals and come across stuff that's not as good. any recs?

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

Aw, doll, I'm so thrilled you've been enjoying my Supernatural stories. There are actually a lot of great writers doing SPN. Here's a short list of people who come immediately to mind:

maygra
estrella30
audrarose
trollprincess
winterlive
traveller
stone_princess (although she hasn't written much lately)

I know i'm leaving out a lot of good writers, but that should get you started. You should also check out The Lawrence Awards (http://www.lawrenceawards.com/main.html). There were a lot of great stories nominated for that. And there are SPN recs on crack_van. I actually took a turn recc'ing if you want to check out specific stories I liked.

Also, there are a few people who make recs in the fandom that I always check out:

esorlehcar
amothea
trollprincess
stone_princess (from the early days of the fandom)

Have fun with it! :)

[johanirae.livejournal.com]

beautiful. I especially love and agree with 2. And 4 is giving me tears ;_;

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you liked this! Thank you!

[pushingyouaway.livejournal.com]

4. He can't remember his mother's smell very well anymore. It used to be so clear, from all the times she held him and made everything better, warm and powdery and a little bit like Lemon Pledge. When he missed her really bad, he'd close his eyes and conjure up her scent, and it was almost like having her back again. Little by little, though, it started to slip away, and Dean can't help being bitter, wondering why he has to lose this, too.

oh...they all hurt. all are so beautifully written and just get you right in the left boob...

*gives you cookies*

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

*gratefully accepts cookies*

I'm so glad you thought this worked! Thanks!

Also, I live in NYC, and your icon makes me DIE laughing. Hee!

[pushingyouaway.livejournal.com]

heh...go jersey/nyc!

[fiona-fawkes.livejournal.com]

That was nice. 2 and 5 (especially 5) were my facorites, though.

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it!

[iamstealthyone.livejournal.com]

Great job! I ached for Dean in Nos. 2, 4 and 5. No. 4 was so, so sad, and the last line in No. 5 was awesome.

Thanks for a good read!

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for commenting! I'm so glad you thought it worked.

[ratcreature]

Oh Dean! 5 delivers a great sucker punch at the end. And I now want to huggle him. ;)

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

Dean definitely needs a hug! For reals.

[oxoniensis.livejournal.com]

#2 just made my heart clench, and so did #4. #5 though, yes, that's something I'd really like to see dealt with more. Lovely (and it thrills me that you're writing SPN again!)

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm hoping they do deal with Sam's powers and their potential for darkness and Dean's reaction to it more in the second season. I found it really poignant in the season finale that Sam *tried* to use his powers to help Dean and couldn't. It'll be interesting to see where they go with that from here.

I can't wait for the season to start!

[alistra.livejournal.com]

Beautiful. And what an icon to go with it. Wow.

Thanks for sharing!

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you liked this! And I really do love that icon. It comes in so handy when posting about poor Dean.

[amanofmydreams.livejournal.com]

wow, i am blown away I loved them all Great thoughts and well delievered...

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you! I'm so glad you thought so. Thanks for commenting!

[floridapeaches.livejournal.com]

These are fantastic. I particularly love numbers 2 and 5. :)

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I had so much fun with this meme! Glad you enjoyed this. :)

[elektrik-storm.livejournal.com]

my heart just dropped. poor dean. *smooshes*

[scribblinlenore.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you liked this! :)