scribblinlenore (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
scribblinlenore) wrote2004-03-25 06:29 pm
scribblinlenore) wrote2004-03-25 06:29 pm
More on the drabble front...
This is a continuation of my drabble for the day Red Light Revelation
Pete was already there when Clark got back to the motel room. He was alone, which was good, and not doubled over the toilet the way he'd been the past two nights, which was also a relief. It was late--Clark had lost track of time wandering the streets, trying to clear his head--and Pete looked rather pissed. He hadn't been a big fan of Clark's going off on his own to begin with.
"Where have you been, man? I was getting worried."
"Um…you know, just out walking. There's so much to see in New Orleans."
Pete rolled his eyes. As far as he was concerned, spring break was about one thing and one thing alone, getting laid, and Clark was a big disappointment on that score. "We missed you down at the bar."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah, man." Pete grew more animated, less annoyed, as he started to recount his evening. "There was this girl Tiffany. Man. You should have seen the boobs on that girl. And she would do this thing where she tucked a shot glass of tequila right there, you know, in her cleavage and let guys do the shot from her boobs. Man! Clark! You should have been there."
"It sounds really…interesting."
"Interesting?" Pete stared at him. "Man, we need to work on your vocabulary, because that wasn't interesting. It was life-altering. That's what that was. I'm talking boobs out to here, Clark." He demonstrated with his hands. "But don't worry. She's going to be there again tomorrow night. I made sure to ask. I didn't want you to miss out."
"You're a pal, Pete," he said, without much enthusiasm.
"So what'd you do tonight? Get into any adventures?"
Clark knew what Pete meant--did he stop any runaway buses barreling toward baby carriages or thwart any would-be burglars--but an image of one of the dancers flashed through his head, thin, graceful body, pale skin, half-hard as he swayed to the music. Clark felt scalded and knew he must be blushing. Sure enough, Pete's eyes widened.
"You, dog! What did you do tonight? Don't tell me nothing. You haven't turned that red since we stumbled on those girls sunbathing topless out at the lake that time."
"Well, I, um…" And for whatever reason, he told the truth. "I went to a strip club."
Pete's jaw fell open. "You went to a-- You did?"
"Yeah. I don't know why exactly. I was just walking past, and there was this big, neon sign outside the place and before I even knew what I was doing, I was paying the cover charge."
"Oh, man. Man! Clark Kent in a nudie bar. I would pay, like, serious amounts of money to see that."
Clark's blushed deepened. "It wasn't that big a deal."
"Clark, it's the very definition of a big deal." Pete beamed at him proudly. "So how was it? I mean, were they completely naked?"
"Yeah." Flashes of glistening skin and sleek muscle swam behind Clark's eyes, and sudden heat prickled along the back of his neck.
"Were they really hot, the women who were dancing?"
Clark almost told him then. His mouth was closing around the words of his confession when he had a sharp recollection of the look on Pete's face when he'd come clean about being an alien, the weeks of strain between them as Pete struggled to adjust to a truth he didn't particularly want to know, the weighed-down expression he still sometimes got from being the only one of Clark's friends privy to his secret.
"Yeah," he said. "They were hot."
"You old dog." Pete whacked him on the knee. "Next time you decide to go off on your own, I'm coming with you. That's where all the action is." He grinned.
Clark made himself smile back. "Or at least, all the surprises."
***
He waited for Pete to fall asleep before pulling the phone into the bathroom. It was an hour earlier in Metropolis, although still the middle of the night.
Despite this, Lex's voice was brisk when he answered, as if he'd been burning the midnight oil on some business deal, which was entirely possible.
"Lex?"
"Clark?"
Just hearing his voice made Clark's chest clench, and even though he wanted very much to say something, anything, the words just wouldn't come out.
"Clark, are you okay? Has something happened?"
He took a deep breath. "No, I'm okay. I just--"
He fell silent, and Lex didn't push. That was one of the things Clark both admired and feared about him. Lex knew how to wait.
"What do you do when-- you find out you're not who you thought you were?"
"That rather makes it sound as if something has happened, Clark," Lex said, very seriously.
He nervously tangled his hand in the phone cord. "I-- I went to a strip club tonight."
"I hate to break this to you Clark," There was a light note of relief in Lex's voice. "But you're hardly the first nineteen year old boy to do that."
"The place was-- I wasn't looking at women."
"Oh." There was a moment, and then Lex said, "I don't know if it helps, but you're not the first guy to ever do that, either."
The band of terror squeezing Clark's ribs eased a little. "It helps."
"It's natural to be curious, Clark."
"It was more than that. Watching them-- I got--" A hot flare of embarrassment choked him.
"It's also natural to be aroused by erotic images. That doesn't necessarily mean--"
"I'm gay, Lex. I realized that tonight."
Lex's voice became very gentle. "Are you upset about it?"
"I'm more like-- surprised. Maybe I shouldn't be. But I am. And it makes me feel like I don't even know who I am."
"You're still the same person you were yesterday."
"I wish it felt like that. I wish I didn't have one more thing I have to--"
He swallowed hard. He wished to God he didn't have to hide the other secret from Lex, so he could really explain. Tell him what was really bothering him, the terrible gut-punch of not being normal in any way.
"Are you going to be all right? I could--"
"No, it's-- Everything's going to be okay," he said, trying to reclaim the magic words of comfort the stranger had given him at the club. "I really appreciate your listening."
"Any time, Clark. Any time."
"It's late. I'd better go. Goodnight, Lex."
"Goodnight, Clark."
He hung up and looked to make sure that Pete was still asleep. He was snoring loudly, which was a relief. Clark put the phone back and got into bed. He stared at the ceiling, knowing he wasn't going to be able to sleep any time soon. But at least he didn't still feel as if he was going to break apart at any moment, and he couldn't remember a time when he'd been more grateful.
***
After a night of tossing and turning, Clark slept late the next morning. He might well have slept into the afternoon if he hadn't been woken up by rather loud knocking. Pete's bed was empty, and Clark sighed as he hauled himself out of bed and trudged over to let him in. Pete had a bad habit of forgetting his room key.
When he opened the door, though, Lex was standing there, not Pete.
Lex smiled broadly. "Not who you were expecting, huh?"
"No. I didn't think--" He threw his arms around Lex and hugged him hard. He wouldn't have presumed to ask Lex to come, but now that he was here, it was the best kind of relief. "I'm really glad to see you."
Lex hugged him back. "Glad to see you, too."
"You didn’t have to," Clark said, as he pulled back.
"No, but I wanted to."
Gratitude made his throat feel too tight, and his "thanks, Lex" came out sounding a little choked.
"Hey, have you eaten yet?" Lex asked. "Why don't I take you out for breakfast? If you're hungry." He grinned. "Oh, wait. Look who I'm talking to. Of course, you're hungry."
Clark laughed, and it felt as if a few hundred tons of weight had been lifted from his shoulders. "Now that you mention it, I could eat."
He threw on some clothes, and they were just about to head out when Pete appeared in the doorway.
"Hey, man you will not believe--" He froze when he saw Lex.
"Oh, Pete. Hi. Um. Guess who-- Lex just--" he flailed.
"Flew into town on business and thought I 'd look you up," Lex lied smoothly.
Pete's expression darkened. "Great, man. That's great. You haven't seen Clark in, what?, two whole days. It's wonderful that you two could be reunited like this."
"Pete," Clark said, sharply.
Lex laid a hand on his shoulder. "I was just going to take Clark out to get something to eat. Why don't you and the rest of your friends come along? My treat."
Pete gave Lex a look like he'd just stepped in dog shit. "No thanks, man. Wouldn't want to horn in on your quality time with Clark."
He stormed back out before Clark could even get out a feeble "Pete!" He let out his breath. "I'm sorry about that, Lex."
Lex shook his head. "This is your spring break trip together, his time to have you all to himself, and then I show up. I can understand why he's not too happy about that."
"It's just that I didn't-- I couldn't tell him. About what happened last night."
Lex shot him a quizzical look.
"I didn't think he'd understand." It was as much of an explanation as he could give.
Lex narrowed his eyes, as if he could tell Clark was telling him only part of the truth, but he said simply, "If you're ready, we should go."
Clark nodded and tried not to feel disappointed that his pure, uncomplicated joy at seeing Lex had a shadow cast on it by the things he had to hide. He locked the door behind them and fell into step beside Lex. wishing for what must have been the quadrillioneth time in his life that things could be different.
I have more I want to write, but I'm going away for the weekend. So maybe next week.
Pete was already there when Clark got back to the motel room. He was alone, which was good, and not doubled over the toilet the way he'd been the past two nights, which was also a relief. It was late--Clark had lost track of time wandering the streets, trying to clear his head--and Pete looked rather pissed. He hadn't been a big fan of Clark's going off on his own to begin with.
"Where have you been, man? I was getting worried."
"Um…you know, just out walking. There's so much to see in New Orleans."
Pete rolled his eyes. As far as he was concerned, spring break was about one thing and one thing alone, getting laid, and Clark was a big disappointment on that score. "We missed you down at the bar."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah, man." Pete grew more animated, less annoyed, as he started to recount his evening. "There was this girl Tiffany. Man. You should have seen the boobs on that girl. And she would do this thing where she tucked a shot glass of tequila right there, you know, in her cleavage and let guys do the shot from her boobs. Man! Clark! You should have been there."
"It sounds really…interesting."
"Interesting?" Pete stared at him. "Man, we need to work on your vocabulary, because that wasn't interesting. It was life-altering. That's what that was. I'm talking boobs out to here, Clark." He demonstrated with his hands. "But don't worry. She's going to be there again tomorrow night. I made sure to ask. I didn't want you to miss out."
"You're a pal, Pete," he said, without much enthusiasm.
"So what'd you do tonight? Get into any adventures?"
Clark knew what Pete meant--did he stop any runaway buses barreling toward baby carriages or thwart any would-be burglars--but an image of one of the dancers flashed through his head, thin, graceful body, pale skin, half-hard as he swayed to the music. Clark felt scalded and knew he must be blushing. Sure enough, Pete's eyes widened.
"You, dog! What did you do tonight? Don't tell me nothing. You haven't turned that red since we stumbled on those girls sunbathing topless out at the lake that time."
"Well, I, um…" And for whatever reason, he told the truth. "I went to a strip club."
Pete's jaw fell open. "You went to a-- You did?"
"Yeah. I don't know why exactly. I was just walking past, and there was this big, neon sign outside the place and before I even knew what I was doing, I was paying the cover charge."
"Oh, man. Man! Clark Kent in a nudie bar. I would pay, like, serious amounts of money to see that."
Clark's blushed deepened. "It wasn't that big a deal."
"Clark, it's the very definition of a big deal." Pete beamed at him proudly. "So how was it? I mean, were they completely naked?"
"Yeah." Flashes of glistening skin and sleek muscle swam behind Clark's eyes, and sudden heat prickled along the back of his neck.
"Were they really hot, the women who were dancing?"
Clark almost told him then. His mouth was closing around the words of his confession when he had a sharp recollection of the look on Pete's face when he'd come clean about being an alien, the weeks of strain between them as Pete struggled to adjust to a truth he didn't particularly want to know, the weighed-down expression he still sometimes got from being the only one of Clark's friends privy to his secret.
"Yeah," he said. "They were hot."
"You old dog." Pete whacked him on the knee. "Next time you decide to go off on your own, I'm coming with you. That's where all the action is." He grinned.
Clark made himself smile back. "Or at least, all the surprises."
***
He waited for Pete to fall asleep before pulling the phone into the bathroom. It was an hour earlier in Metropolis, although still the middle of the night.
Despite this, Lex's voice was brisk when he answered, as if he'd been burning the midnight oil on some business deal, which was entirely possible.
"Lex?"
"Clark?"
Just hearing his voice made Clark's chest clench, and even though he wanted very much to say something, anything, the words just wouldn't come out.
"Clark, are you okay? Has something happened?"
He took a deep breath. "No, I'm okay. I just--"
He fell silent, and Lex didn't push. That was one of the things Clark both admired and feared about him. Lex knew how to wait.
"What do you do when-- you find out you're not who you thought you were?"
"That rather makes it sound as if something has happened, Clark," Lex said, very seriously.
He nervously tangled his hand in the phone cord. "I-- I went to a strip club tonight."
"I hate to break this to you Clark," There was a light note of relief in Lex's voice. "But you're hardly the first nineteen year old boy to do that."
"The place was-- I wasn't looking at women."
"Oh." There was a moment, and then Lex said, "I don't know if it helps, but you're not the first guy to ever do that, either."
The band of terror squeezing Clark's ribs eased a little. "It helps."
"It's natural to be curious, Clark."
"It was more than that. Watching them-- I got--" A hot flare of embarrassment choked him.
"It's also natural to be aroused by erotic images. That doesn't necessarily mean--"
"I'm gay, Lex. I realized that tonight."
Lex's voice became very gentle. "Are you upset about it?"
"I'm more like-- surprised. Maybe I shouldn't be. But I am. And it makes me feel like I don't even know who I am."
"You're still the same person you were yesterday."
"I wish it felt like that. I wish I didn't have one more thing I have to--"
He swallowed hard. He wished to God he didn't have to hide the other secret from Lex, so he could really explain. Tell him what was really bothering him, the terrible gut-punch of not being normal in any way.
"Are you going to be all right? I could--"
"No, it's-- Everything's going to be okay," he said, trying to reclaim the magic words of comfort the stranger had given him at the club. "I really appreciate your listening."
"Any time, Clark. Any time."
"It's late. I'd better go. Goodnight, Lex."
"Goodnight, Clark."
He hung up and looked to make sure that Pete was still asleep. He was snoring loudly, which was a relief. Clark put the phone back and got into bed. He stared at the ceiling, knowing he wasn't going to be able to sleep any time soon. But at least he didn't still feel as if he was going to break apart at any moment, and he couldn't remember a time when he'd been more grateful.
***
After a night of tossing and turning, Clark slept late the next morning. He might well have slept into the afternoon if he hadn't been woken up by rather loud knocking. Pete's bed was empty, and Clark sighed as he hauled himself out of bed and trudged over to let him in. Pete had a bad habit of forgetting his room key.
When he opened the door, though, Lex was standing there, not Pete.
Lex smiled broadly. "Not who you were expecting, huh?"
"No. I didn't think--" He threw his arms around Lex and hugged him hard. He wouldn't have presumed to ask Lex to come, but now that he was here, it was the best kind of relief. "I'm really glad to see you."
Lex hugged him back. "Glad to see you, too."
"You didn’t have to," Clark said, as he pulled back.
"No, but I wanted to."
Gratitude made his throat feel too tight, and his "thanks, Lex" came out sounding a little choked.
"Hey, have you eaten yet?" Lex asked. "Why don't I take you out for breakfast? If you're hungry." He grinned. "Oh, wait. Look who I'm talking to. Of course, you're hungry."
Clark laughed, and it felt as if a few hundred tons of weight had been lifted from his shoulders. "Now that you mention it, I could eat."
He threw on some clothes, and they were just about to head out when Pete appeared in the doorway.
"Hey, man you will not believe--" He froze when he saw Lex.
"Oh, Pete. Hi. Um. Guess who-- Lex just--" he flailed.
"Flew into town on business and thought I 'd look you up," Lex lied smoothly.
Pete's expression darkened. "Great, man. That's great. You haven't seen Clark in, what?, two whole days. It's wonderful that you two could be reunited like this."
"Pete," Clark said, sharply.
Lex laid a hand on his shoulder. "I was just going to take Clark out to get something to eat. Why don't you and the rest of your friends come along? My treat."
Pete gave Lex a look like he'd just stepped in dog shit. "No thanks, man. Wouldn't want to horn in on your quality time with Clark."
He stormed back out before Clark could even get out a feeble "Pete!" He let out his breath. "I'm sorry about that, Lex."
Lex shook his head. "This is your spring break trip together, his time to have you all to himself, and then I show up. I can understand why he's not too happy about that."
"It's just that I didn't-- I couldn't tell him. About what happened last night."
Lex shot him a quizzical look.
"I didn't think he'd understand." It was as much of an explanation as he could give.
Lex narrowed his eyes, as if he could tell Clark was telling him only part of the truth, but he said simply, "If you're ready, we should go."
Clark nodded and tried not to feel disappointed that his pure, uncomplicated joy at seeing Lex had a shadow cast on it by the things he had to hide. He locked the door behind them and fell into step beside Lex. wishing for what must have been the quadrillioneth time in his life that things could be different.
I have more I want to write, but I'm going away for the weekend. So maybe next week.
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