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scribblinlenore) wrote2004-12-14 06:51 pm
scribblinlenore) wrote2004-12-14 06:51 pm
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Holiday Season Feedback Challenge: Feedback for Gothphyle
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pun's Feedback Challenge, I was lucky to get gothphyle. It gave me an excellent excuse to go back and reread her stories. Coincidentally, there was a story that had been on my mind, and I wanted to read it again, but I couldn't for the life of me remember who wrote it, because I have the worst memory. And yay for serendipity, it happened to be one of gothphyle's.
So it's going to be the first one I talk about…
Anastomosis
Words that come to mind to describe this story include: Gut-wrenching. Powerful. Poignant. Heartbreaking.
"Anastomosis" turns canon on its ear and takes a look at what would happen if Jor-El got his way. If it were Clark, not Lex, who destroyed the world. Or, I should say, Kal-El. Because that's the heart-stopping tragedy of this story, the slow annihilation of Clark Kent.
It begins with Clark trying to resist Jor-El's voice in his head, but the story has an inexorable feel throughout, and even though Clark does his best to fight, his fear that he won't prevail is palpable…
Lex thinks that *his* father is a demon personified, but he knows differently. There is one Satan's spawn in Smallville, but it's not Lex.
One of the things that makes this story so effective is that Clark has every reason to succeed. He's no disaffected outcast seeking vengeance. His ties to humanity are as strong as they could possibly be, parents who love him, and an intimate relationship with Lex. There is, literally, nothing on Earth that can save him from his fate. What makes it all the more affecting is that the change isn't abrupt. No rock wall brainwashing. Jor-El just slowly eats away at his soul.
Until finally…
Jor-el doesn't speak to him anymore; he doesn't have to. He claws through Clark's soul every minute, ripping and tearing, shredding that which he rejected. That which rejected him.
There are two specific retellings of canon events, both SV and the larger universe, that I just think are brilliant.
The first is Lex's lost hand.
…it's Lex that bears the burden of proof, hand crushed beneath his grasp as he clenches tight in passion, his pale flesh bruised with marks and scars that never fully fade from his shadowed eyes these days.
That part gets me no matter how many times I read it. And this too…
Lex wears a black glove over his prosthetic hand, and he still smiles when he sees Clark walk through the door at the end of the day, still greets him with a kiss and the slow, turgid slide of flesh on flesh. But *he* knows that soon this, too, will end. The proof of that lies in his deadened skin, impervious to even the glove's soft glide, as much as in his crystalline heart.
The idea of Lex still trying to hang onto Clark after what Clark did to him speaks of love more than any actual love scene ever could. It's so incredibly sad, too. One of the great epic themes in storytelling is the redemptive power of love, and Lex gives it his all, but there is no love large enough to bring Clark back from the brink.
gothphyle also makes chilling use of the apocalypse scene in "Hourglass," with a whole different meaning …
He feels wetness, and hints of warmth, and is surprised to find so much sensation left in his armored skin. The droplets of red seeping through his pores come faster and faster, falling to the ground more swiftly than his descent. He watches them spatter against Lex's face, against his suit, against the golden petals of the flowers.
And of course we ultimately get to the point of no return…
For a brief moment he *sees* what his father has done, sees the tear in the soul that divides Kal from Clark and watches the El spill over until Clark is hopelessly muddied and corrupt, bathed in blood and regret. But then the moment is gone, and he is left to the cold, gray world, too chilled for Lex to warm and too lost for Martha to find.
"Anastomosis" is beautifully written and emotionally powerful, a fascinating subversion of the Superman myth.
The other story I'm going to talk about is my all-time favorite Post-Exodus story.
Swimming with Sharks
I remember reading it several times in a row when it was first posted, because it packed such a punch and it felt so real. It's a very insightful look into what makes Lex…Lex, the qualities that helped him survive the plane crash. They are also, paradoxically, the same qualities that will make him so dangerous later on.
The story is simple enough, Lex doing laps in the pool, something he's always done. But it's about facing his demons now, not getting exercise. He's swimming with the sharks. It's incredibly poignant and also kind of scary the way Lex keeps going back, makes himself do this, face his worst fear, with this obsessive, half insane determination that you just know he's learned at Lionel's hand. It's a perfect, convincing picture of what Lex might have been like when he got back to Smallville, how he went about trying to recover.
I love the part Clark plays in this: catalyst, incentive, reward. It seems so right that Lex will conquer the water by submerging himself in it for the purpose of giving Clark a blowjob.
A deep breath, and he [Lex] was under the water, sound drowned beneath the roar in his ears. His lips opened wide, the rush of water filling his mouth, his throat, before being forced out by the solid weight of Clark's cock.
So easy to let go, to release his breath, to embrace his fear and inhale the water that knocked against his palate. But not now, not with Clark thrusting heavy and ripe against his tongue, battering his throat with blunt jerks and the heavy, salty tang of semen and chlorine. His ears pounded, blood thumping in his temples as his vision blurred, starred hot and red with the need for oxygen. Clark tugged against his shoulders, backing away, trying to raise him higher, ease free from his mouth, but he was having none of it.
The best sex scenes are ones that help tell the story, and this one says so much about who Lex is, his strength and courage and the crazy part of him that just has to push the envelope.
A recurring theme in Alee's stories is that nothing is simple, and I love that she makes it clear that just because Lex fought his demons and won this day doesn't mean the battle is over…
Tomorrow, he would swim again. The water would lap cold and unforgiving against his flesh, and the sharks would circle him once more. For today, they were slain, and he was here. Whole. Alive.
Because that's the way life really is, complicated.
pun's Feedback Challenge, I was lucky to get gothphyle. It gave me an excellent excuse to go back and reread her stories. Coincidentally, there was a story that had been on my mind, and I wanted to read it again, but I couldn't for the life of me remember who wrote it, because I have the worst memory. And yay for serendipity, it happened to be one of gothphyle's. So it's going to be the first one I talk about…
Anastomosis
Words that come to mind to describe this story include: Gut-wrenching. Powerful. Poignant. Heartbreaking.
"Anastomosis" turns canon on its ear and takes a look at what would happen if Jor-El got his way. If it were Clark, not Lex, who destroyed the world. Or, I should say, Kal-El. Because that's the heart-stopping tragedy of this story, the slow annihilation of Clark Kent.
It begins with Clark trying to resist Jor-El's voice in his head, but the story has an inexorable feel throughout, and even though Clark does his best to fight, his fear that he won't prevail is palpable…
Lex thinks that *his* father is a demon personified, but he knows differently. There is one Satan's spawn in Smallville, but it's not Lex.
One of the things that makes this story so effective is that Clark has every reason to succeed. He's no disaffected outcast seeking vengeance. His ties to humanity are as strong as they could possibly be, parents who love him, and an intimate relationship with Lex. There is, literally, nothing on Earth that can save him from his fate. What makes it all the more affecting is that the change isn't abrupt. No rock wall brainwashing. Jor-El just slowly eats away at his soul.
Until finally…
Jor-el doesn't speak to him anymore; he doesn't have to. He claws through Clark's soul every minute, ripping and tearing, shredding that which he rejected. That which rejected him.
There are two specific retellings of canon events, both SV and the larger universe, that I just think are brilliant.
The first is Lex's lost hand.
…it's Lex that bears the burden of proof, hand crushed beneath his grasp as he clenches tight in passion, his pale flesh bruised with marks and scars that never fully fade from his shadowed eyes these days.
That part gets me no matter how many times I read it. And this too…
Lex wears a black glove over his prosthetic hand, and he still smiles when he sees Clark walk through the door at the end of the day, still greets him with a kiss and the slow, turgid slide of flesh on flesh. But *he* knows that soon this, too, will end. The proof of that lies in his deadened skin, impervious to even the glove's soft glide, as much as in his crystalline heart.
The idea of Lex still trying to hang onto Clark after what Clark did to him speaks of love more than any actual love scene ever could. It's so incredibly sad, too. One of the great epic themes in storytelling is the redemptive power of love, and Lex gives it his all, but there is no love large enough to bring Clark back from the brink.
gothphyle also makes chilling use of the apocalypse scene in "Hourglass," with a whole different meaning …He feels wetness, and hints of warmth, and is surprised to find so much sensation left in his armored skin. The droplets of red seeping through his pores come faster and faster, falling to the ground more swiftly than his descent. He watches them spatter against Lex's face, against his suit, against the golden petals of the flowers.
And of course we ultimately get to the point of no return…
For a brief moment he *sees* what his father has done, sees the tear in the soul that divides Kal from Clark and watches the El spill over until Clark is hopelessly muddied and corrupt, bathed in blood and regret. But then the moment is gone, and he is left to the cold, gray world, too chilled for Lex to warm and too lost for Martha to find.
"Anastomosis" is beautifully written and emotionally powerful, a fascinating subversion of the Superman myth.
The other story I'm going to talk about is my all-time favorite Post-Exodus story.
Swimming with Sharks
I remember reading it several times in a row when it was first posted, because it packed such a punch and it felt so real. It's a very insightful look into what makes Lex…Lex, the qualities that helped him survive the plane crash. They are also, paradoxically, the same qualities that will make him so dangerous later on.
The story is simple enough, Lex doing laps in the pool, something he's always done. But it's about facing his demons now, not getting exercise. He's swimming with the sharks. It's incredibly poignant and also kind of scary the way Lex keeps going back, makes himself do this, face his worst fear, with this obsessive, half insane determination that you just know he's learned at Lionel's hand. It's a perfect, convincing picture of what Lex might have been like when he got back to Smallville, how he went about trying to recover.
I love the part Clark plays in this: catalyst, incentive, reward. It seems so right that Lex will conquer the water by submerging himself in it for the purpose of giving Clark a blowjob.
A deep breath, and he [Lex] was under the water, sound drowned beneath the roar in his ears. His lips opened wide, the rush of water filling his mouth, his throat, before being forced out by the solid weight of Clark's cock.
So easy to let go, to release his breath, to embrace his fear and inhale the water that knocked against his palate. But not now, not with Clark thrusting heavy and ripe against his tongue, battering his throat with blunt jerks and the heavy, salty tang of semen and chlorine. His ears pounded, blood thumping in his temples as his vision blurred, starred hot and red with the need for oxygen. Clark tugged against his shoulders, backing away, trying to raise him higher, ease free from his mouth, but he was having none of it.
The best sex scenes are ones that help tell the story, and this one says so much about who Lex is, his strength and courage and the crazy part of him that just has to push the envelope.
A recurring theme in Alee's stories is that nothing is simple, and I love that she makes it clear that just because Lex fought his demons and won this day doesn't mean the battle is over…
Tomorrow, he would swim again. The water would lap cold and unforgiving against his flesh, and the sharks would circle him once more. For today, they were slain, and he was here. Whole. Alive.
Because that's the way life really is, complicated.
no subject
Anastomosis was absolutely painful to write in the sense that the images and the helplessness of it all just... wouldn't stop, and you touched on the very detail that made it so heart wrenching for me:
To hear that you liked it so, and to read the absolutely gorgeous things you say, leaves me stunned and in awe.
And, if I was stunned before, reading your comments on Swimming With Sharks leaves me speechless. I am humbled, and so, SO honored by your words.
Thank you so much! {hugs}
no subject
It was a great pleasure writing feedback for you! *hugs*
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I really should comment when I read the stories instead of saving it all up.
We have several mutual friends, and I solemnly swear that I am not your mother or your boss. And if I were John Ashcroft I would be too busy kicking myself in the ass to spend any time on LJ.
no subject